I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
