I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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