My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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