it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize