They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Randomize
