Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
