Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
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