Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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