So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
Randomize
