i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
