Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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