If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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