what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
