Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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