operation harelip BJ is a go
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Randomize
