Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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