My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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