how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
he was CRYING into my vagina
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
pray to the hookup gods
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
