its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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