I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
