We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
