as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
