So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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