Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
