That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
