just tell him i said nine months
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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