Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
