I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize