I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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