I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Randomize
