We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
i would punch a child for taco bell
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Randomize