So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
