Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
i out mim tonsoeep
Randomize
