my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
