Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
So apparently I’m into choking now
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