Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
