I only kidnapped one of them. chill
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
