Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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