i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Randomize
