I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
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