so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
We need to rekindle our bromance
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
