Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
