I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
