the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
