physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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