There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
porn star boner night. come get it.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
