You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
