Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize