in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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