dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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