Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
